Joke of the day...

Ok, so this one may cause you to roll your eyes and snicker to yourself.

A cowboy walked into a bar and ordered a whisky. When the bartender delivered the drink, the cowboy asked, "Where iseverybody?"
The bartender replied, "They've gone to the hanging."
"Hanging? Who are they hanging?"
"Brown Paper Pete," the bartender replied.
"What kind of a name is that?" the cowboy asked.
"Well," said the bartender, "he wears a brown paper hat,brown paper shirt, brown paper trousers, and brown papershoes."
"How bizarre," said the cowboy. "What are they hanging himfor?"
"Rustling," said the bartender.

HT: my mom

Panty tip of the day...

Most of you know I'm a big fan of Women's Health (see side link), the best magazine I've ever subscribed to. If you purchase a copy of it this month, there's a side benefit. Near the front, there's a pull-out perforated coupon for a free pair of white cotton panties from Victoria Secret, woohoo! And a $10 off coupon for the VS newest line of sports bras.

Spare Me My Life...

Ok, I have a slight strange and unusual addiction to fitness informercials. I'm always interested in the newest video, exercise equipment, miracle cure. Over the years, my mom and I have done Sweatin' to the Oldies (man, he's odd), Tony Little's Target Training (what is that guy on?!?!), and my favorite that I think really works and is fun anything from the Firm series. Perhaps, because it's the only one I've used that hasn't featured an over the top, hyperactive male. Recently, B bought me the new Firm Transfirmer. I tried it out today and it was fantastic. I highly recommend it if you're into home fitness. I also tried out the Windsor Pilates ring lately and was relatively unimpressed. I'm not a big fan of Pilates anyway (probably because I am so weak through the core), but it just didn't do it for me.

Anyway, all of that to say, this is the oddest combination fitness video of all time. Watch it all the way through even though it's a bit long.

Yesterday's Ride

22.6 miles in 90 degree heat in a bit under 2 hours.

All in all, a very good ride. The funniest part of it was that I had no bike bag and my dad's mountain bike (I was down in Sullivan County again) has a water bottle spot but no water bottle. So, I took Anna's small ballerina backpack - think bright pink, ballet shoes, with a nice bedazzled jewel - and filled it with 3 cold bottles of water and my mom's cell phone. I'm sure I looked very "special" riding down the road with a preschooler's bag on my back.

No soreness today (a teeny bit stiff when I first got up this AM but totally clear now) and I could have ridden longer. Luckily I dodged a huge storm. 10 minutes after I returned it let loose and POURED for the next hour and an half. Unfortunately, I had planned to ride as far or further this AM but the rain was continual during the time I needed to go. Next time, I'm riding 50. :)

Lest you think I Jest

Ow...

Ow, Ow, Ow.... I am sitting at my computer with a very sore neck/back, an incredibly bruised right upper arm, and a nice rub burn on both my arm and my neck having recently returned from the Immediate Care center near our house. Luckily, no major damage, everything is superficial and I didn't have to have a tetanus shot but OW.

So how did I find myself in such a predicament this fine afternoon? Well I hopped out on the mower, hoping to get the yard mowed this afternoon (it's halfway done at least). I was zipping along in the backyard on the riding mower, near the swingset. I went under the swings on one pass, no problems - this is something I do all of the time. The next time I went through, something went dreadfully wrong and folks I ended up with my neck caught in one of Anna's swings with the mower, in 4th gear mind you, continuing on a trajectory toward the big pond. As I gagged, several thoughts went through my mind - not too different from Becky T.'s (sensitive ears or small people reading, be mindful) tale of falling off of the porch but a bit more serious.... crap, omg I am not going to get this thing off of my neck, crap crap crap, it could take my head off, even if I do get it off, I'm going to end up in the pond, this is going to jerk me off of the mower, this is going to make for one heck of an obituary, Brian is going to have to answer the question "She did what?" at the funeral...

As the doctor @ the Medcheck place said - the good Lord kept me from serious harm. And while I'm achey, she said ibuprofen and rest should take care of it. Really I wasn't overly inconvenienced (have to finish the yard tomorrow, missed my spinning class tonight) and the biggest bruise was on my pride. A doctor friend of mine noted that I should have got it on tape because I could have won AFV... I was glad no one saw.

Cancer, Church Splits, Divorce, and a Good Bike Ride

So I have plenty that I could blog on today... some good friends are traveling the path of divorce, my mom was recently diagnosed with a skin cancer spot and two good friends are currently in cancer treatment, my childhood church (6th grade through beyond college when I would go home) is going through a messy nasty split with lies coming from the Sr. Pastor, but I what I'm choosing to blog about is an awesome bike ride I had yesterday.

Many of you know that this year I've made the most firm commitment to fitness that I've made well ever. I've been consistently in the gym at least 5 days a week for the entire year, changed my eating habits, and have been training to ride the RAIN ride (we'll still see if that happens). As a result, I've dropped about 17 lbs (yes I am bragging a little). Anyway, yesterday, while celebrating Father's Day with my parents, I took a wonderful country ride on backroads near their 10 acre property.

I saw 5 deer on 2 different occasions. 2 ran right in front of me as I pedaled along. It was the perfect temp as I could work up a good sweat without becoming dehyrdrated. While it was a bit windy, that kept me comfortable. I got a little lost, which made me nervous because while gangs will kill you, hillbillies will keep you. But I saw some beautiful country, rolling hills, creeks, trees, flowers, cornfields, birds singing, and good tunes on my iPod... ah, home. As a side note, "Boondocks" and "Wide Open Spaces" fit much better with a country ride than "The Humpty Dance" and "Gonna Fly Now" sure moved my butt down the highway (YEAH for the Tennessee mix!). I did both road riding on SR 63 and some gravel roading it which was a great resistance exercise built in. And in the end, I cleared close to 13 miles (12.8) in a little under an hour, moving at a fair clip. I felt great, not even worn out and today I'm barely saddle sore. It was the best part of the weekend, by far.

I have issues...

Ok, no big shock to most of you... Cherie has issues. Notice, not an issue, but issues plural - one of which came to the surface today when I was working out at the gym. There I was full on plugging away with heavy duty cardio on the eliptical... doing the hill program with the resistance ramped up to level 17 about 24 minutes into a 65 minute workout and this guy gets on the machine next to me. Now, I have no problems working out next to others. I'm not big on talking to people - especially strangers - while I'm working out (which happened yesterday on another cardio machine) b/c I want my heart rate to the point where I can barely breathe, let alone talk. And fortunately this guy didn't try to talk to me but what he did was even worse! Consistently for the remainder of his workout which was about 7 minutes less than mine he snorted, hawked up stuff, and blew his nose on his shirt. EEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! And this was not a one time, but I've gotta get this mucus out of my system thing, it was a continual over and over and over again sort of thing. DISGUSTING. I shot him a few dirty looks but what I really wanted to do was spit on him (not exactly the best way to cope with my anger, I know but in all honesty it was what was continually crossing my mind).

I guess I just want the same courtesy that I extend to others. One early AM this spring when I was working out, I had a bit of a coughing fit. Two coughs in, I got off, went to the stretching area, tried to drop my heart rate and resume normal breathing. It didn't work, so I went down to the locker room where I hawked up some stuff (gross, I know but let's be honest here) but couldn't quit coughing so I went home! When you have to blow your nose that many times on your shirt your body is telling you something - GO HOME and rest. YUCK. That is all for now.

When your husband is a lawyer

When your husband is a lawyer, a quick trip to the grocery store to buy water, milk, and lunch meat can turn into an hour and a half ordeal.

Let me explain, Anna and I quickly ran to Kroger to pick a few minor items. Somehow, an hour and a half later, we ended up with a cart full of things but that's beside the point. So, in the water aisle (we buy bottled water, yes we're water snobs), I picked up three gallons for Kroger Spring Water (while we are snobs, we're not too uppity to buy generic) and turned around to get the Kroger Purified Water 24 pack of bottles. Anna was walking along with me and as we ventured back toward the cart, Anna found a large puddle of water and fell.

The lawyer's daughter slipped and fell in a major chain grocery store. Oh crap, I thought. Brian and I have often joked about the fact that we've many times slipped in a store but never can seem to fall so that we can sue. And here is Anna on the floor, in tears complaining of ankle pain and me realizing that my quick trip has just turned into a long one. I picked her up and dusted her off, did the you're fine talk and then dialed Brian. His directions were to go to the manager, file a report, and make sure that someone mopped it up. We did file a verbal report but that wasn't enough when I called him back so I had to talk to the manager again, look around for the other lady who witnessed the fall and puddle (never did find her), try to take some pics with my phone (which I didn't end up doing b/c I felt like a total tool).

The manager was pretty nice (she took all of our info, talked to B on the phone, and interviewed Anna about the incident) and I'm sure Anna is fine but I guess it's for the best to follow all of the steps just in case there is a problem later on down the road, especially with Anna's challenges due to low tone and loose joints.

Whew, it was not the shopping trip I had planned.

Crawl into my bed . . .

So the title alone should grab your attention today. I'm going to vent/expound on one of my greatest pet peeves today. Hopefully it will keep you, the reader, from asking me my most dreaded question.

A well meaning friend asked me recently if we had considered having another child. Now, when you have one child, aged nearly 4, most people assume that you should quickly have another. SIDE NOTE: Brian and I are pretty indifferent about having another child. There are pros and cons to both making a choice to bring another child into the world and to remaining with our current status of an only child. It's pretty amusing really that I am so indifferent (perhaps this isn't the best choice of words . . . we would be thankful if we had another child, we would be thankful if we did not) considering that I once longed for three children (you can keep that stuff - now watch me get pregnant with twins someday). And by the time that Brian and I married, I just assumed we would have at least two. After all, we both came from two child families and both of us are youngest children. However, after having Anna we've fallen into a pattern of life that is now pretty easy. There are no diapers to change, there are no midnight feedings, Anna plays on her own, and aside from giving herself a haircut this week doesn't do too much crazy dangerous you must watch her every minute stuff. The further away from the baby stage that we get, the less I long to have another baby. As well, considering Anna's size and all of the C-section challenges, I must be honest that there are physical factors that deter/distract me from getting preggers. That's not to say that that might change someday but at this hour, at this minute that's where I'm at.

Ok, so I've digressed quite a bit just to set up where I'm coming from. I think that asking if you plan on having more children is quite possibly one of the most intimate, intrusive, and out of line questions one could ask. I've noticed it more and more in the recent past. In all reality, it's asking what is your sex life like? Can I crawl in bed with you? Are you ovulating right now? How are Brian's sperm counts? Are you going to attempt conception right now, right here? Come on, so that you can have another child get it on right in front of our very eyes? Now granted, people don't intend this line of thought but in all reality it's what that question boils down to. Brian and I last night brainstormed a list of totally inappropriate, make people blush responses about specific areas of our sex life so that they would never EVER ask again and so that they would tell everyone they knew not to ask as well. However, this is just as cruel and inappropriate so I'll abstain (from replying, not from sex just to keep things clear here).

I always think, you know, Brian and I are pretty private people. What if we were trying to get pregnant (we're not, FYI) and had not been successful or worse yet had had a miscarriage. A question like that would drive me over the edge, I am quite certain. I honestly think that most people don't even think about what they're saying when they ask such a loaded question. I have often fantasized about running away in tears when someone opens the subject just to "punish" them. I know, I know - I'm sick.

So at least now you know, unless I have opened such a conversation up with you, don't ask. If we were thinking about having another child, pregnant, or trying, you would know. We would tell you. I would blog about it. Until then, please get out of my bed.

Gospel

It's always good to share good news... and this is some terrific news for a acquaintance/friend, Scot Longyear, who pastors a church in Terre Haute that B and I used to frequent long ago. He also used to be lead in a band that we loved who came and did a couple of conferences for us when I worked for the church. Anyway, I digress.

Scot received a Lily Clergy Renewal Grant from the Lily Foundation and is going to get to do all kinds of cool and crazy things in the summer of 2007 while his congregation is well cared for, encouraged, and challenged in good 'ole Terre Haute, IN.

Scot's love for Christ and energy for spreading the gospel in new and interesting ways spills out all over the edges. And though we've not been to eXchange for several years now, I've kept up with his sermons on my iPod as they podcast. It's always awesome to see someone blessed who has blessed your life and the life of your family.

For full details check out this Tribune Star article or go to their website (if you're an audial learner) and hear details of the grant.

Can't look away

I'm not sure why I'm so fascinated with this video. What are they selling? Or are they just touting a household tip? Looks like there's a phone number on there at one point.

And the winner is . . .

So, the American Idol finale is tonight and while I really wanted to Chris to win and so I could care less about who the actual winner is, I was wondering who everyone was pulling for - Katherine or Taylor?

And you thought gas was expensive here . . .

Check out the prices in California (how come I can't say that state name without singing... California, knows how to party... California).

Happy, Happy Birthday Baby...

Today is BLowe's 30th birthday. Send him greetings via e-mail or phone or post on his blog.

This week's site

So I ordered B a shirt or two for his birthday and another for a friend from RandomShirts.com. They came today in the mail and are terrific. I even got a little poster as a thank you. I didn't realize it was a Christian company. They have a ton of witty yet not obnoxious shirts for great prices. Very cool stuff.

Just too easy...

So my mom sent me this article on the local weather teams in good 'ole Terre Haute, IN (the homeland). Apparently, Jon Stewart has been picking on the tv station just down the road from my alma mater, WTWO. Here is the first piece that was featured on the daily show, followed by the "Humble Apology."

Crazy, insane week to come

Ever have a Monday when you realize the week that lays ahead could possibly gobble you alive? I have a lot to do as many people will be coming in this weekend to celebrate B's 30th, a yard to get mowed and flower beds to get all in order in spite of the fact that our rider is in the shop and it will not quit raining, and our church is undertaking a Kidstuf production which I've invested in that still has many loose ends to tie up.

And with that, I'm off!

Site of the Day

So I know I've told plent of you about Mystery Guest, INC. Brian and I did a quick lunch shop today at Smokey Bones. Basically, it's a mystery shopping service. It costs nothing and every 90 days, you can do a mystery shop at Smokey Bones, Cheesecake Factory, Bahama Breezes (or other chains owned by this conglomerate). Then, they reimburse you for your purchase (up to a certain amount), after filling out a simple survey online.

Free food is always good.

Saved By the Bell the Addict Years

Enjoy this dramatic piece...